As fall gives its last goodbye this week to winter, I am reminded of having to let go in my life to a dear friend.  It was one of those situations where things were said out of honesty.  After all was said and done, it really doesn’t matter what was said, honesty discussions happened in a bad way.  It is very apparent that most of the time this letting go of such love in a friendship and companionship is the same as a death in your life.  You wait for the phone to ring and it doesn’t, or the phone rings and you hope it is the voice you can depend on.  But it is neither.  Your heart hurts, and you doubt yourself tremendously.  But for personal physical, mental, and spiritual health, we sometimes have to say goodbye.  You have to regain your confidence in reaching out to others because of the experience.  Again  in order to heal we must let go.  If you are saying your last goodbye to someone this week or someone in your past, remember you must move on.  I hope todays writing will speak to you in an inspirational way!

You Are Free

I trusted you.

I opened up my pain and hurt to you

And my joy and gladness.

You made me believe that I mattered.

 

You made me believe that my soul was special to this world and other worlds.

I had thought this was a friendship that was forever.

If only I knew how I went wrong?

What did I do?

What did I say or not say?

 

How can I turn the time back.

I cannot say I could not do it again,

Because I do not know what I did in the beginning.

I confided about the life I was living,

But I must have not been living right.

 

I was only trying to make it through a dark time when my heart hurt for family.

It saddens me so and my soul hurts.

I know I cannot let this hinder God’s glory and direction for me.

For it will take time I have found to move forward rather than moving back.

 

For so often over the year I have questioned and questioned what I have done?

What did I do?

I have allowed you to make me question my faith too much.

I have allowed you to wedge my heart with doubt.

I have allowed you to make me question who I am.

 

I am trying hard to accept.

To accept this road that has been set.

I have hurt and I have cried so many days and nights.

I have been mad and I have been glad.

 

You have gone behind me and shared with others my heart’s sounds.

So I know it is time to let go.

We have always said how hard freedom really can be.

But I know I must set you free.

 

Free to not speak with me.

Free to not talk with me.

Free to not just sit with me.

No obligation to me.

 

I do not wish harm for you.

I do not wish bad days for you.

I do wish I did not have to be with you nor work with you.

For pain comes quicker than the joy of the past.

 

I will continue God’s glorious path for me.

With you or without you.

I will hurt more but,

The hurt will grow the heart back.

 

I know deep down you are a good person.

A person with good intentions.

But your soul needs to grow.

Maybe this is what the hurt and pain in your life has done to you.

 

Caused you not to accept others for who they are.

Caused you to not accept love for who you are.

Caused you not to accept the love of others.

You need to learn to love thy neighbor as thyself.

But first you must learn to love yourself.

 

Although I go into the valleys and the mountains,

I know who I am.

I am a servant of God.

I serve children for God’s purpose.

I serve my family for God’s glory.

 

Go in peace my old friend,

And mourn the loss you have created for yourself.

For one day when the river has been crossed,

Maybe you will want to know me again.

Lori Rennae Chapman

God’s path for you is so much greater than what you can imagine.  Learn from this experience and use it to make your life more incredible and joyful!  Pain leads to gain.  Through this pain take what God has taught you about yourself to gain more spirituality.  Whether that soul ever returns to your life or not, you must joyfully move forward so your spiritual path will not be hindered.  Let go!  Say goodbye!  Welcome the new souls that are led your way!  I am blessed to have you as a new soul!

Love,

Rennae

 

Journey